I bought some kohlrabi. I’ve never worked with kohlrabi before, mostly because, well, they look like something i don’t really want to eat. The upside-down octopi of the vegetable world, or something similar. I’ve seen alien beasts on star-trek that resemble these things, sputtering at passersby with nasty, toothy grimaces that appear out of nowhere and hissing voices so you know there’s danger afoot.
I found out, however, that these things are harmless. I sustained no injuries during the processing of this food, and papercuts or carpel tunnel not withstanding, during the composition of this blog post, so I have to report that Kohlrabi is harmless.
Until you eat it.
Taking the advice of a poorly constructed, anonymous website, I sauteed the greens and ate them.
note to self: only take advice from well designed websites
No amount of mastication could get these greens to not suck. Yes, I cooked them for a long time. longer than perhaps I should have, but I treated them just like the beet/turnip/collard greens I love. They weren’t good.
Perplexed and more than a little discombobulated, I still had the bulbs to contend with. Are they bulbs? them crazy looking things grow above ground, I’m not sure what to call them. Anyway, I cut those ugly bastards up and tried a piece. Nothing doing–a texture not far from Jicama, but with a cardboard/cellulose taste that I found unbecoming. Not a soul on the interwebs suggested cooking these, so into a hot mixture of Apple Cider Vineager, Olive Oil, tons of Coriander seeds, S&P they went. they’re in my fridge, I’ll let you know how they turn out.
moral of the story–if it’s too ugly to eat, it’s probably too ugly to eat.
