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kitchen injuries

Jul 24th, 2007
by Mark.

I get hurt. A lot. I’m decrepit considering my age, with bum joints, scars aplenty and numb skin from errors long past and recent.

I also work in a kitchen. Thus, as one can imagine, I’m slapping on a bandage and a finger condom more often than I’d like. What’s interesting, or perhaps just fucking strange, is that I never cut myself with a knife. I think it’s my body’s supreme desire to be esoteric in all ways: if i’m going to get injured, It’s going to be interesting. The major culprit? the Dishwasher. no, I’m not getting repeatedly attacked by a slightly slow, fould tempered, mullet sporting 80s throwback named Billy Jim (not at this job, at least), I’m losing knuckles to sharp edges on our Jackson. Right now I have matching wounds on each of my thumbs. all 5 of them. Mirror images. phooey.

Anyway, I’m also sick with rage about the Tim Donaghy scandal–I mean, I knew it was fixed, but I dind’t think it’d be the mob. Ithought it was Stern making like Vince McMahon and giving the people what he thought they wanted. But no, it’s some fuck-wad from west Philly making sure my suns don’t get the championship they so richly deserved. Fuck me, I’m so fucking done with the NBA.

Like Vandusen said:

“This has to be the biggest scandal done unto the citizens of Phoenix since they discovered Baja Fresh was using food coloring on its guacamole.”

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  • mbent

    Hi,

    I am writing to inform you about Share Our Strength’s Great American Bake Sale, a national campaign that mobilizes Americans to help end childhood hunger by having a bake sale in their community. Now in its’ fourth year, over 1 million people have participated in the campaign to aid the 12 million children in America who are at risk of hunger. The campaign, which runs through August, was recently promoted by celebrity chef Rachael Ray on ABC.

    Share Our Strength’s Great American Bake Sale offers a unique way for you to connect with your readers about the severity of childhood hunger in America while providing them with a simple and fun way of how they can fight it. Perhaps you can include information about the campaign in a section of this blog?

    I was unable to find an email in which to contact you. Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions, and I can provide you more information about the campaign.

    Thank you,

    Mercedes
    Share Our Strength
    mbent@strength.org
    (800) 761- 4227

  • mbent

    Hi,I am writing to inform you about Share Our Strength’s Great American Bake Sale, a national campaign that mobilizes Americans to help end childhood hunger by having a bake sale in their community. Now in its’ fourth year, over 1 million people have participated in the campaign to aid the 12 million children in America who are at risk of hunger. The campaign, which runs through August, was recently promoted by celebrity chef Rachael Ray on ABC. Share Our Strength’s Great American Bake Sale offers a unique way for you to connect with your readers about the severity of childhood hunger in America while providing them with a simple and fun way of how they can fight it. Perhaps you can include information about the campaign in a section of this blog?I was unable to find an email in which to contact you. Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions, and I can provide you more information about the campaign. Thank you, Mercedes Share Our Strengthmbent@strength.org(800) 761- 4227