Scenarios for the US team’s success or failure aren’t hard to find, but mine are funny. The final matches in our group are England v Slovenia and the USA v Algeria. The long and the short of it is: the US will advance if we do as well (or better) than England in the final games.
Edit: Thanks to Nevets in the comments for going through ALL the tie breaks and catching some math mistakes.
Points now:
World Cup Group C points after 2 matches
| Points | Goals For | Goals Against | Goal Differential |
| Slovenia | 4 | 3 | 2 | +1 |
| USA | 2 | 3 | 3 | 0 |
| England | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 |
| Algeria | 1 | 0 | 1 | -1 |
The Goals For & Goal Differential columns are really important. Trust me.
Scenarios:
Scenario 1: England beats Slovenia, US beats Algeria
| Points |
| USA | 5 |
| England | 5 |
| Slovenia | 4 |
| Algeria | 1 |
Whichever team has the highest goal differential will finish first. Right now, US & England are tied.
Scenario 2: England ties Slovenia, US beats Algeria.
| Points |
| USA | 5 |
| Slovenia | 5 |
| England | 3 |
| Algeria | 1 |
Team with the highest Goal Differential will finish first.
Scenario 3: Slovenia beats England, US beats Algeria.
| Points |
| Slovenia | 7 |
| USA | 5 |
| England | 2 |
| Algeria | 1 |
Fabio Capello will be knee capped by the future Wayne Rooney, who has been tricked by Dr. Who and doesn't know he's too late to change the past! muahahahahaha!
Scenario 4: England beats Slovenia, US ties Algeria.
| Points |
| England | 5 |
| Slovenia | 4 |
| USA | 3 |
| Algeria | 2 |
this would suck.
Scenario 5: England ties Slovenia, US ties Algeria.
| Points |
| Slovenia | 5 |
| USA | 3 |
| England | 3 |
| Algeria | 2 |
Goal Differential is the first tiebreak.
If the US and England manage to finish with an equal Goal Differential, there's a tie break. What's that tie break? Drawing lots. Old school.
Scenario 6: Slovenia beats England, US ties Algeria.
| Points |
| Slovenia | 7 |
| USA | 3 |
| Algeria | 2 |
| England | 2 |
The end of England as we know it, and the ladies from Greennovate will shout from the rooftops. I love that I know Slovenians. There aren't that many.
Scenario 7: Slovenia beats England, Algeria beats the USA.
| Points |
| Slovenia | 7 |
| Algeria | 4 |
| USA | 2 |
| England | 2 |
England will melt, and Clive Owen will lead a fascist uprising (John Waters will direct). Bob Bradley will be fired, and, well, America will go on being fans of other sports we invented and therefore dominate. People like me will dwell on the phantom foul for years. Our simmering hatred of one person from Mali will kill their fledgling tourism industry.
Scenario 8: England ties Slovenia, Algeria beats US
| Points |
| Slovenia | 5 |
| Algeria | 4 |
| England | 3 |
| USA | 2 |
This would also suck.
Scenario 9: England beats Slovenia, Algeria beats US
| Points |
| England | 5 |
| Slovenia | 4 |
| Algeria | 4 |
| USA | 2 |
Continued sucking, but with more gloating from your English friends. 2nd place would again be decided by Goal Differential. Sad pandas like me start dreaming about Brazil 2014.
